I may be the most fervent foodie you could ever meet, but I am not an insomniac who gets excited about sehri outings. Sorry, calling them "Suhoor Nights" does not make them any different. How can I enjoy sehri parties when I yawn every five minutes?

Unfortunately, these days, sehri hangouts are something you have to do to be cool. I too, attend at times, but out of sheer compulsion: assignments such as food reviews, friends with no life, and invitations from corporate professionals with — you guessed it — no life!

Why would anyone want to take a hundred selfies around midnight? Why would you want to make a reel at 1 AM? Also, why would there be a fashion show at 3 in the morning? I encountered all these during sehri, and cannot tell which one was worse. I loathe dressing up at unearthly hours, but most importantly, having that energy after iftar.  I would rather stay home in my pyjamas, heat a bit of rice and leftover chicken in the microwave and be done with sehri and return to bed ASAP.   

Even worse are the lavish feasts that go on at these parties! Who has the mood to eat this much during sehri? The extravagant banquets would put to shame the Roman emperors I saw on History Channel.

Whenever I attend such sehri parties, I always feel very thirsty the whole day afterwards, due to consuming rich food. Also, without a good night's sleep, I walk around like a zombie the next day, not to mention being cranky because I was up most of the night.

We are not Batman. Let's not behave like one.

As for corporate parties, my policy is not to engage with co-workers after office.

"You are missing out! Roads are so quiet and peaceful late at night" — my friends argue.

You know what else is quiet and peaceful late at night? Your home!

"But what about Old Dhaka? Don't you want to go to Nazira Bazar? It's open all night!" — My friends sometimes retort. Here's a fun fact: Nazira Bazar is also open throughout the year and the food tastes just as good, or bad. Hence, no need to lose sleep over it.

Of course, "New Dhaka" has caught up with the trend. Posh restaurants with groggy-eyed waiters put on fake smiles and play along. Parking lots get busy whilst the street dogs look in awe what humans are doing at odd hours of the night.

Meanwhile, I am at home, asleep, and my father is breaking down the door to wake me up so that I don't miss sehri, as my phone's alarm clock is also in the same pursuit.

But people will say, "What's wrong with sehri outings just a couple of times?"

No, good sir/ma'am, it's a couple of times with friends, a couple of times with your other friends, a couple of times with co-workers, a couple of times with family — and you end up being out for sehri almost a dozen times in a month!

Ironically enough, the most buzzing nightlife this city sees is during Ramadan! Which eatery serves what and which place has the best food during sehri becomes the talk of the town. Not me. My socials are asleep at night just like me.

I don't get the hype. I side more with Ted from "How I Met Your Mother," as he quotes his mum saying, "Nothing good ever happens after 2 AM!"