Studio planning reboot of show that hasn’t been created yet

As studios across the industry have started to run out of unique ideas, they have decided to regurgitate older and slightly famous TV shows, sitcoms, and movie franchises they own the rights to. Superhero movies are playing the nostalgia card so often that fans don't even take the deaths of their computer-generated imagery (CGI) superhero in a CGI set seriously anymore. However, in the middle of this crisis, Generic Studios Ltd. has stood out by coming up with the idea of rebooting a show that hasn't even been created yet.

"Harry Potter's not been gone even a decade now. We've already had spinoffs, reunions, fan-fictions, plays and questionable tweets about it but they still aren't done milking that cow. They've milked Harry Potter more than proud Shahbagh University students milk their public university tags. Yet, we're getting a reboot," said Shadman Feige, CEO of Generic Studios Ltd.

"Studios have rebooted their TV shows and franchise more times than I've rebooted my computer with viruses. Fans are tired of it. They need something new and original! Sure, we could try hiring a bunch of new writers, brainstorming new ideas, and coming up with something that isn't a reboot, rip-off or sequel but the risk factor is just too high," he said. "For a new show, I'd actually have to pay the writers and that's everything we stand against here at Generic Studios. My audience has an average attention span of six seconds. If I'm going to reboot the show in six years anyways, why not just skip the original and make the reboot first?"

Generic Studios is also aware of the diversity needed in their casting choices.

"We want to make sure our project is marketable to gullible teenagers across the globe. People in Asia go crazy over their favourite actor having a screen time of six seconds in a Hollywood project. So, we've decided to pick one actor from every major industry across the globe without caring about whether they even fit the character description or not."

Shadman also spoke about the budget, "About 20 percent of the budget involves green screens and the rest of it in marketing. If we have any spare changes left, maybe we'll even consider paying the overworked VFX artists. Let's face it, the audience couldn't care less about the CGI as long as there are a hundred cameos in the film. Most of the superhero films these days look like early 2000s Disney films. Yet, they work wonders! Is it solely because of the naivety of their fanbase? Sure. But it's also because of the hundred cameos they shove in each film."

Meanwhile, fans are reportedly very excited about the reboot of their favourite franchise that doesn't even exist in the first place.

"The social media is already riled up about the casting of a person of colour and how it isn't book accurate, although the show isn't based on a book. The 18th reboot of Genericman is also coming later this year. I can't wait to see the generic superhero's father figure die for the umpteenth time on the big screen! A brand-new superhero movie about a comic book character I didn't know existed until last week was also announced and I'm super excited. It's a good year for a movie-goer with an IQ below room temperature."

Remind Ifti to be quieter at hasiburrashidifti@gmail.com