Two of your friends have started dating, now what?

You know that moment when two friends from the group start acting a little too friendly? It's when they start sharing inside jokes that the rest of the group aren't in on, sit suspiciously close together, and laugh at each other's not-so-funny jokes. The rest of the group sees it coming before the two friends involved even admit to it. And when they finally do — the group collectively experience catharsis. After all, everyone else, except the couple, knew.

It's cute, at first. You feel like you're a part of the history. There is a new kind of energy in the group. Everyone's a little cheerful, the jokes become funnier, and everything seems to be falling into place. Suddenly, you find yourself rooting for them. There's a comfort in knowing that love found its way into your circle. Watching them hold hands, plan surprises for each other, or quietly take care of one another is genuinely heartwarming.

There is, however, always a delicate balance you must follow. As a friend, it is your responsibility to make sure that the jokes don't go too far. And when they fight, you pretend to not know what's going on, so you don't have to choose one over another.

Overtime, hanging out starts feeling a little different. You find yourself third wheeling more often than you'd like. Then comes picking up phone calls late at night because they've had a massive fight, which later devolves into you being appointed the unofficial peacekeeper. You get calls from both sides and hear entirely different stories of the same argument. You simply nod, sympathise, and maybe try to be diplomatic so that both parties can stay calm. But secretly, you wish to go back to the life where the biggest drama involved canceling trips.

But along with the fights, comes a fear: What if they break up? What will happen to us?

It probably sounds a little selfish but we have all thought about it. And when it happens, it's awkward, painfully awkward. The group chat goes silent for days. You start having separate meetups without even realising it. The balance is gone, and everything feels off for a while.

Over time, things start to settle. Time does its thing. We grow up, become more mature. Maybe they start talking again, or they don't. The group finds a new rhythm. It's definitely not the same as it was before but it still remains something to cherish. Even after the chaos unravels in the group, there's something kind of sweet about it. You get to see the friendship and love evolve, where both learn to navigate the awkward tension and eventually continue to remain friends (if they do).

I still think about those moments — the inside jokes, the heated arguments, and the awkward silence after the breakup. But now I realise, it's all part of the story that we will laugh about years later.

"Remember when they dated?"

We might pretend that we weren't mildly traumatised. On the off chance that they do end up together, the friend will get to experience something of a fairy tale. No one knows what the odds are, but it is a gamble worth taking.

Nusrat Meherin Faiza is a writer, tutor, and chronic overthinker. Reach out to fuel her overthinking at [email protected]