Have you ever wondered why you can never begin a project until there are only five minutes left before the deadline? Have you ever questioned why, despite waking up on time, you are constantly late for class? Have you noticed how downtime suddenly becomes the utmost priority right before exams? Chances are, you are on your way to becoming a professional procrastinator.

I believe it all started when I was born three days later than I was supposed to. I was apparently killing time by exploring the womb and rotating inside it. By the time I had finally learned to walk, children my age were already participating in miniature marathons. I started speaking so late that my parents decided to send me to preschool after my cohorts had already moved to kindergarten.

For a very long time, my parents and everyone else I encountered believed that I was an introvert. I couldn't explain to them, however, that I was being given too little time for my brain to devise a foolproof plan in order to make friends. It would either be time to leave a party or it would be time for school to end as I took my sweet time perfecting the imaginary conversation starters. 

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Breaking out of a procrastination cycle

I would decide to read my favorite novel in the middle of my exams and then put off finishing it because of a show I started watching. Then I took it up a notch and left the episodes halfway to keep playing a new mobile game I downloaded. Ultimately, my pile of "unfinished business" just kept evolving into a tower.

Like most of you, I would also make "writing journals daily" one of my New Year's resolutions. It would begin well, until I ended up finishing a day's entry the week after that. Weeks soon turned into months, then months became years, and there's now probably an incomplete journal entry from 2018 because I couldn't stick to it. I also have an embarrassing number of "to be continued" novels on my Wattpad writing list that never got beyond the first chapter!

How late is "later"?

I always struggle to find my clothes since I never get around to actually sorting out my closet because I say I will do it "later." Instead of sifting through the mess and feeling miserable about how much I excel at procrastinating, I prefer browsing fashion blogs on Instagram and Pinterest. You'll never hear me say, "I will organise my clothes today" over "I have nothing to wear!"

It's all fun and games until I have a two-page article, a five-thousand-word essay, and a full-fledged research proposal due on the same night. I could have been done with the assignments if I had not been too busy stressing myself out by complaining about how much I procrastinate and then procrastinating some more while trying to relieve that stress.

At one point in time, I had started to believe that I was just lazy, but I soon realised that the two were completely unrelated. I can handle several responsibilities, do a million tasks, go sleepless for days, or even multitask, but once I decide I will do something "later," the date of expiry on it becomes nonexistent.

Joyeeta spends an awful amount of time daydreaming and laughing at her own jokes when she's not miles-deep into the darkest depths of Meta Reels and procrastination. Rant with her at Instagram.com/smolbabyjo.