HARTAL/OBORODH SAFETY GEAR

Some people just want to watch the world burn. That is as understatement. Most people want to watch the world burn. But most people want a safe distance between them and whatever is burning. Common sense you know. SHOUT has your best interests at heart and that's why I was chosen to write this piece on 'how to save yourself from hartal/oborodh violence and burning'.
Wear a helmet. The shockwave from a bomb (they aren't all molotovs) will, from a distance, disorient you. The screaming people around you don't help make sense of things either. The force from the explosion reaches your ears and affects the part concerned with balance. If you're fashion conscious and think you'll look like a dork wearing a helmet, you could make The Stig or Daft Punk's helmet all by yourself.
I got this one from “Back To The Future”. Wear the detached iron door of a soot stained stove and make sure to hide it under your regular clothes. This is guaranteed to protect you from outlaws aiming punches at your abdominal area and from sharp objects intended to be used for culinary and/or disembowelling purposes.

Stilts. Stilts are the answer. I assure you nobody in Bangladesh has had to deal with stilts and violence together. They wouldn't know what to do! So just wear your stilts and walk wherever you want. This isn't ideal for great distances. For that, I would ask you to ride a really tall unicycle… somehow.
Now if you don't have the guts to go out during these violent times, hiding in plain sight is always an option. Build yourself a vehicle, or use one you already possess, preferably something silent. Electric cars are a plus due to their silent engines. Create an appropriate camouflage so you can pass undetected.
In the past few months, a lot of cosplay competitions have taken place here in Dhaka. With your valuable participation experience, you should be able to dress yourself up as something none of the hartaleers and oborodhists would risk tangling with. Try something cute, intimidating or something to pity.

Am I being discriminatory if I can't tell apart hartaleers and oborodhists?