Rockstar rising

It all started with one European show called "Idols". Three judges auditioning a bunch of musical talents (or disasters), that's mostly what the show was all about. And at the end of the line was a record contract for the winner who can then soar his way into stardom. Realizing its popularity among the pop-loving populace the Americans came up with their own American Idol, based on the same concept. After four seasons they did yield some considerably talented artists like Kelly Clarkson and Bo Bice, but they also managed to endorse a few humiliations like Ruben Studdard, Fantasia Barinno and Clay Aiken. Now this show made it's mark all around the globe including the southeast of Asia. So downright inevitably India came up with Indian Idol and Fame Gurukul (seriously, is it possible to invent a dumber name?). And if only they featured any talents it could have been justified. Gathering freak-shows from every nook of India these, two are dubiously the utmost idiotic shows aired in entertainment history.

So at this point Rockstar INXS enters the scene. Now, what is Rockstar INXS? Surely, if you have any relation with cable television then you must have noticed it by now. It's the new "Idol"-istic reality TV show, which would be better termed as "Rock Idol". The gig is about finding a new rock n roll singer for INXS. INXS is an old Aussie band probably from the late 80's and early 90's. Despite the stats they flash at you each time their name is mentioned, I personally think the band never made it big-time. Sadly (or should I say gladly) their addict of a vocal died sometime in the mid 90's and that was the supposed end of INXS. That is until they came up with the idea of handpicking rock talents from three continents and choosing one of them as their new vocal.

So basically, Rockstar INXS is the same thing as all the "Idols". It's just like all the others, where loads of talented singers are exploited in some way. The selected singers stay at some deluxe crib, in this case the famous Rockstar Mansion in Hollywood (if it's America it just has to be Hollywood). They sing their hearts out, give their best and every week someone is eliminated. And thus they proceed to the end as slowly as possible. They even have an episode each week, which only shows how the singers are preparing for their next performance. And they also try to add some drama here and there, which is totally meaningless. Since INXS isn't known by much of our generation, they also brought along Dave Novarro (was once in Red Hot Chili Peppers, I don't know when) and supermodel Brook Burke, who is hosting the show, for their popularity. I could just say that the whole idea is pointless, but it still earns a lot of cash and it might be the only reason the band members are in for.

Without all its shortcomings Rockstar INXS can be very entertaining for people like me, who consider rock music as an essential daily mind-fodder. It adds a bit of variety to what you listen to. What sets it apart from the other shows is that, the rockers are really talented and they revamp classics like you've never heard them before. Some of the covers I really liked was R.E.M.'s Losing My Religion, Stone Temple Pilot's Interstate Love-song, The Killers' Mr. Bright Side and Britney Spears' Baby One More Time (it was originally covered by Travis). They are suppose to air the final episode the same Thursday you will be reading this, so you can still catch some of the performances if you haven't seen them yet or you could just go to the website www.rockstar.msn.com and watch all the performances from week one. Some of their original songs are simply awesome.

But the bottom line still stands, if it is a vocalist INXS is looking for then it will never work out. I mean, the band members are like in their mid forties and fifties and the singers are in their twenties and early thirties. Their outlook about things will be totally different. How is it ever possible for them to cope with that and create contemporary rock music? If you ask me, I'll say INXS are just not the chart topper types and they never will be. But here's to all the rockers who got on the Rockstar stage and took the audience by storm. ROCK ON.

[Note: To all the INXS, Ruben, Fantasia, Clay, Abhijit, Amit, Rahul, Prajakta and Fame Gurukul fans, do not bug my superiors with hate-mails. Questions, comments, criticism and pure malice directed towards the author can be sent at the following e-mail address: voldemort2099@yahoo.com.]

By Knafice-Man

Mythical monsters

Due to space constraints last week the whole of Horrific Appendages wasn't printed. Here are the two monster siblings that got left out.

Hydra:
The Hydra, also called the Lernaean Hydra or the hydra of Lerna, was a many-headed serpent. It is debated that he had nine heads. It is a sibling of Chimera and offspring of Typhon and Echidna. It is called the Lernean Hydra because it lived in the lake Lerna in Argolis. Hydra released poisonous fumes into the air and for that it was impossible to go near it. King Eurystheus of Tiryns, on Hera's orders, sent Hercules on his twelve labors. The second of the twelve was to kill Hydra. As Hercules went to the lake he covered his mouth and nose with a cloth and went in to kill Hydra. But for each head he cut, two would grow in its place. And when this continued Hercules' morale started to cripple. He then called for his nephew, Iolaus, for help. Then when Hercules cut off each neck Iolaus sealed the neck with fire so it wouldn't grow back. In the end only the immortal head was left. Hercules buried it under a rock.

Nine-headed serpents were also found in Hindu mythology. The story of Hercules and Hydra are explicitly described in Greek myths. Artifacts of the Hydra include pot paintings of ancient times. Some poets said that the Hydra had so many heads that even the potter couldn't draw them.

Cerberus:
Cerberus is another offspring of Typhon and Echidna. This hideous monstrosity is a three-headed dog with snakes for mane and a tail. He guarded the gates of Hades, the land of the dead. He only let shadows and spirits pass through and imprisoned them in there for eternity. No living soul could pass him, but only three mortals subdued him. One was Orpheus, who used the power of magical music to put him to sleep.

The there was Aeneas, who by the aid of a woman called the sibyl drugged him. And the other was Hercules who captured him by his might and took out of the Underworld and brought him back to the upper world. This was the twelfth and the mostly deadly labor of Hercules. After completing this he became immortal.

So, that's about it for this week. Join me when I come back with more deadly ancient monsters.

By Knafice-Man

The feelings I have for you

It's time to let you know
My true feelings towards you!
I need you more than I need myself
I am never gonna let you down
Always gonna be ground.
And I'll be waiting to know
If you need me.
I can cry for you,I can die for you
There's nothing I wouldn't do for you
This isn't a crush;
It might be something else!
Which starts with the alphabet'L'
The feelings I have for you
Is driving me insane!
I am going crazy for you
Because I can't sleep, I can't eat:
I just think about the things that you do.
I know I can't express my feelings
To you the way I want to
So I guess my song can express
All I want to say to you!
But I know it very well
That letting you know about my feelings for you
Won't make you talk to me again
I know you"ll be walking out of the door
Not knowing that I'll feel sore.

By Ammeta Hafiz

Simply yours

When you come running to me,
With eyes spilling with tears,
I feel I have all the strength in the world
To support you;
To take you in my arms,
Care for you,
And protect you;
Endure anything just to give you
A little bit more comfort and security.
It seems I can go through anything
Just to make you smile again
Because your smiling face is the sun,
That brightens up my every day
And without you,
I'm just a nobody in the darkness.
You are everything that matters,
Everything that makes sense in my life
May the same God who blessed me with you,
Bless you too...

By Tausif Salim

She

A she
A flower still without a bee.
Or she is more lifeful;
A yellow butterfly.
A creeping plant,
That sometimes stands
And sometimes lie.
She is a rose
Bloomed but in bud
A jewel, a pearl or a stud.
She is a green parrot
In green clad
I don't know whether she is
arrogant or made with mud.
She is innocent,
A virgin.
She is light of dawn
I really mean.

By Khalid Nazmus Sakib