Point of view

What's in an Eid?

“Brilliant', 'Quite Good', 'What?', these are just some of the comments made recently in the press regarding the Eid. The subject of the Eid is a controversial issue. Many an afternoon has been enjoyed by a family, bonding over the discussion of the Eid. While much has been written on its influence on contemporary living, spasmodically it returns to create a new passion amongst those who study its history. The juxtaposition of the Eid with fundamental economic, social and political strategic conflict draws criticism from global commercial enterprises, obviously. Keeping all of this in mind, in this essay I will examine the major issues.

At first glance the Eid may seem unenchanting, however its study is a necessity for any one wishing to intellectually advance beyond their childhood. Though the Eid is a favourite topic of discussion amongst monarchs, presidents and dictators, its influence on western cinema has not been given proper recognition.

Though I would rather be in bed I will now examine the primary causes of the Eid.

Social Factors
Society is a human product. The immortal and indispensable phrase 'honesty is the best policy' must have been referring to the Eid. While some scholars have claimed that there is no such thing as society, this is rubbish. Difference among people, race, culture and society is essential on the survival of our world; however the Eid provides standards by which we may judge our selves.

A child's approach to the Eid helps to provide some sort of equilibrium in this world of ever changing, always yearning chaos. Status, Security, Fame - the Eid, all revolve around this 'golden fleece'. It grows stronger every day.

Political Factors
Our world is driven by supply and demand. We no longer live in a world which barters 'I'll give you three cows for that hat, it's lovely.' Our existence is a generation which cries 'Hat 1020 Tk.'

Politics was once a game featuring competitors from elite classes. Placing theory on the scales of justice and weighing it against practice can produce similar results to contrasting the Eid and ones own image of themselves.

In the words of Nobel Prize winner Bonaventure H. Amster 'A man must have his cake and eat it in order to justify his actions.' He was first introduced to the Eid by his mother. To paraphrase, the quote is saying 'the Eid wins votes.' Simple as that.

Why did the Eid cross the road? - To get to the other side! Just my little joke, but let's hope that the Eid doesn't inspire similar hilarity in the next elections.

Conclusion
How much responsibility lies with the Eid? We can say that the Eid has, and will continue to be a major building block for the world in which we live. It sings a new song, 'literally' plants seeds for harvest, and statistically it's great. To reiterate, the Eid is, to use the language of the streets 'Super Cool.' It brings peace, it stimulates and statistically it's great.

One remarkable thought from the talented Ozzy Morissette: 'My Daddy loved the Eid and his Daddy loved the Eid.' Let's finish with a thought from star Britney Lopez: 'I love the Eid? Yes! Hurray for the Eid!'

Disclaimer: this article is not meant to be taken seriously.

By Ahmed Ashiful Haque

Saying goodbye to a friend

It had been too good for too long. It was bound to come to an end sooner or later. Both of us knew it. And the end has come. Time to go our separate ways and discover the world out there on our own. It is inevitable. Yet it's hard to imagine that one day very soon she won't be just one phone call away, or sitting just in the next bench.

I can't even remember the time when she wasn't in my life. We were told that we met when we were 3 years old (we are maternal cousins, and she was born in Iran). That was a lifetime ago. Even when I did not know of her as a person I claimed that she was my best friend. I was surprised to hear the recorded voice of my two-year-old self declare that I talk to her all the time.

Our dreams of being with each other all the time came true one day when we were admitted to the same school in 3rd grade. Since then we have been through thick and thin together for 8 years. We were inseparable. Twin souls, soul mates- whatever you call it. Most of our teachers did not know our names apart; they called us Anika-Sumaira. We laughed and cried and rejoiced together. In all the years of our friendship we never had a fight. Not that we did not disagree on anything, we had cold-war sort of thing. We used stop talking to each other for about two minutes then start talking as if nothing had happened.

There was no fighting, but there was love and there was sharing and so much of both. We shared our dreams, our secrets, our fears...our souls. Some people would be very surprised if they knew the kinds of things we discussed, from very important matters to the silliest ones. For us everything was worth discussing from every little detail of a regular day to how theories of physics are not "really true". We did not have common tastes but that did not seem to matter. We complemented each other. Our differences and our similarities made our bond stronger.

It has been a long journey growing up together, discovering the world together, and making sense of the changes around us together. Through all this our relationship had undergone changes but one thing remained the same that we were each other's best friends. I think we are probably among the very few people who really know what a "best friend" really is. What a priceless gift it is to have a real one.

Along the way even I forgot. I took her for granted. I took it for granted that she will always be there to ease my worries, my pains, to boost me, to say, "We will make it", to make me laugh, to trust me. I remember when the first day I went to my new job I was overcome with nervous tension. And all I could think of was how it would have been easier if she was here. That day it came to me that she was my strength among everything else. Whenever we have an exam the thought that she is also studying the same thing and is probably worrying about the same things gave me a boost, made me feel like i am not alone in this. We are in it together. That thought made everything look so much easier.

They say you don't know what you have till you lose it. Well I know exactly what they mean. I was quite aware of how lucky i was to have her as my best friend but i learnt how important she really was to me when she went away for a while. i remember how miserable i felt going to school for the first time in 8 years knowing she wouldn't be there. I remember picking up the phone 6 times in four days to tell her about something on the TV or about the new joke I heard or even sillier things than that. I thought, in time I would learn to live on my own, to keep everything locked up inside me. I wanted to learn to live without her cause even then I knew we were heading for a change. I thought I made it. I went through three long months without bursting. Then she came back. Just seeing she drove it home how lonely I was without her these three months. That night we talked and we talked and we talked. We did not stop till we had told each other everything that happened to us these last months. Before we dozed off the last thing that went through my mind was "how am I going to live without her."

But the hard truth is i will have to. I will have to learn. Because too much is changing. By next year we would be oceans apart. And this epic would finally come to an end. I don't know why I am even writing this. Probably to remove this burden that I have been carrying in my heart for a few months. Probably to get rid of the feeling that I am losing a part of myself, probably to tell myself to except it gracefully and move on, probably to finally except that its time to say goodbye. Then why are the tears that I held back for the last few months, the tears that I vowed not to shed are flowing like they are never going to stop.

Once, a man told us that as long as we were together, we would be successful. I believed him. Even if we are not going to be together physically, she will always be here with me in a special corner in my heart. I will carry her with me and imagine her expressions and her chidings and her voice whenever I need it. I hope she knows that I will always be there for her.

I wonder if she knows how special she is to me or how I sometimes think of what she would say to me in different situations or how she sneaks into my prayers or how it gives me strength just to know she is out there somewhere. But I hope she knows that I want her to succeed. To achieve her dreams, to get all the happiness she deserves. So when she leaves I will not cry I will let her go with a smile and whisper to her best of luck my friend. Go out there and show them what you are capable of.

I don't know how things will change between us when we are apart or what will happen to us but I will always treasure our friendship and look back on our days of joy wherever I am or whatever I am doing.
Dedicated to Sumaira

By Anika Raisa

Jokes

The dumb guy bashing
A dumb dude and his friend were going to Disneyland when they came to a fork in the road. The sign read: "Disneyland Left." So they turned back and went home.
The dumb dude became a waiter and asked a patron, "May I take your order, sir?"
"Yes," the man replies. "I'm just wondering, exactly how do you prepare your chickens?"
"Nothing special, sir. We just tell them straight out that they're going to die."

*****

One day a secretary is leaving on her lunch break, and she notices her boss standing in front of a shredder with a clueless look on his face. He's the dumb dude. The secretary walks up to him and asks if he needs help.
"Yes!" he says looking and sounding relieved, "This is very important."
Glad to help, she turns the shredder on and inserts the paper. Then her dumb dude boss says, "Thanks, I only need one copy."

*****

One afternoon the dumb dude came home from work to find total mayhem in his house. His three children were outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard.

The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing.

In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.

Dumb dude quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she may be ill, or that something serious had happened. He found her lounging in the bedroom, still curled in bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went.

He looked at her bewildered and asked, "What happened here today?"

She again smiled and answered, "You know every day when you come home from work and ask me what in the world did I do today?"
"Yes" was his incredulously dumb reply.
She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it!"

*****

Two friends, one an Optimist and the other a Pessimistic dumb dude could never quite agree on any topic of discussion. One day the Optimist decided he had found a good way to pull his Pessimistic friend out of his way of continual Pessimistic way of thinking. The Optimist owned a huntin' dog that could walk on water.

His plan? Take the Pessimistic dumb dude and the dog out duck hunting in a boat. They got out into the middle of the lake, and the Optimist shot down a duck...the dog immediately walked out across the water, retrieved the duck, and walked back to the boat.

The Optimist looked at his Pessimistic friend and said, "What do you think about that?"
The Pessimistic dumb dude replied, "That dog can't swim, can he?"